To my darling Ophelia,
It has been quite rubbish weather recently, I do hope you have your angel wellies on and a raincoat, Mummy doesn't want you to get cold. Today has been nice though so I am sure you are nice and warm.
Did you see what your Mummy and Daddy did yesterday? We went on Safari! Only to Woburn but you work with what you've got. It was a fun day, did you see all the wonderful animals, which was your favourite? Was it the Monkeys? Daddy liked the Bears the most, they walked out right in front of our car which he thought was very cool. Mummy liked the Elephants and Penguins, Daddy and I were lucky enough to see three Elephants holding on to each other as they walked down the road, it was very cute. I have added some pictures just in case you missed any of the animals.
Today was spent sorting the garden out, it is hard work, not the type of work Mummy particularly enjoys but satisfying none the less. We only have one more bit to weed (we are leaving the mass at the bottom for the time being, it is beginning to resemble a jungle but it is a bit too much to deal with right now!) and then we can get ready to sow some grass seed, it is going to look really big when it is done. I wish you could have seen it Squidge, you would have enjoyed climbing the apple tree, I am sure your daddy would have built a tree house for you, he would have loved that.
Everyday we think about what we have missed out on and what we would be doing if you were here. The cruel reminder you are not, is the hundred upon hundreds of other parents proudly pushing their Maxi Cozy's around, nowhere is safe from them. We had bought you a really pretty one with loads of different colours splatted all over it, Mummy was so looking forward to putting you in that as we left the hospital. Now we do not know if we will ever get to use it or if it will end up in the loft along with our unrealised dream. To say I hope our dream does come true is an almighty understatement, our desire for it is all consuming.
Mummy doesn't cry as much as she did in the early days, I miss that. I miss the debilitating ache. I miss the puffiness of my eyes. I felt closer to you then. Each day that passes is a day further from you and although I take you with me everywhere, I miss your smell, I miss the feel of your skin, I miss holding you in my arms. My arms yearn for you, my heart beats for you, my brain thinks only of you. You are my world and I am forever broken without you. The light has gone out and I although I know it can once again begin to shine, it will never be as bright as it once was.
We live without you only to make you proud, we hope you are.
Miss you incredibly.
Mummy and Daddy
PS... I hope you like the flowers we left for you on your grave, there are pretty just like you.